Looking at the box for my sons "Castle Jump-o-line," I began to wonder about etymology. (the study of words and their history.)

'Why didn't the box say, Castle "Trampoline?" I thought to myself.

'Is that a term reserved for the spandex type bed that provides "the bounce?" Is the word "trampoline" subject to copyright?' I stood up and walked to my computer. It had been reset the night before by its operating system, Windows XP.

'Ug. I hate it when XP reboots without my permission. Now I have lost an entire night of uploading legal BitTorrent files. This is all service pack three's fault! Now I am required to declare a user before the GUI will load...' I dropped uTorrent into my startup file so that, in the future, uTorrent would at least boot after explorer, (the file manager, not IE (Internet Explorer) the internet browser that may be the worst computer thing ever invented,) had been loaded. I ran Eclipse, the JDK (Java Development Kit) that I use, and my mind wandered.

'Many of the terms that we use are held in copyright, yet we use them every day to cover all items within the same ilk. For example, most people use the term "iPod" to denote a portable media player which plays digital music files. This definition in and of itself is inaccurate as most people mean "mp3" files even though iPods and other personal digital music players can play a variety of musical formats. I still think that Apple should allow iPods to play FLAC files; their small file size and lossless fidelity, (a fancy way of saying data compression which is also fancy come to think of it,) would go a long way to fixing the youth culture's inability to understand what "audiophile" means, much less why it's important. Though admittedly, the current youth is not to blame for their lack of historical knowledge. In my day, "Walkman" was a term used to denote personal music player even though "personal stereo" would have been far more accurate.' Still waiting for Eclipse to load, I opened Firefox and typed in "Trampoline." Surprisingly, the browser crashed... an occurrence so rare that, I wasn't sure I had ever seen its BSOD before. I re-loaded, (he he, the Matrix rules... but the sequels sucked!) the browser and, after typing "Trampoline" into Wikipedia's (lol, I Wikipedia'ed (wait, what's the past tense of Wikipedia?) Wikipedia,) quick search extension, my browser crashed again.

'WTF?' I thought as I hit "Start-> Turn Off Computer-> Restart" (oddly, Wikipedia (you're there dude!) doesn't have a "Turn off Computer" entry,) and waited for my computer to re-boot.

'I need to get back to writing, but I can't because my teeth feel dirty. And it's too early to brush them again; it's only been two hours. Other generalized trademarks that people have colloquialized to denote a family of potential products are, "Kleenex" for tissue, (why would "Kleenex" already have a "purple" underline in my browser?) "Google" ("It's not a joke... if you type "Google into Google, you can break the internet... no one try it.") to search the internet, and "Trampoline" a term that was coined by George Nissen to describe his version of the "rebound tumbler."' I had learned of the last one within a second or two of reading before my browser had crashed and wanted to learn more.

'Is "trampoline" truly a generalized word? Either way, isn't the verb "jump" a better prefix to describe this particular product category anyway? I am to understand that it's mostly children who play on trampolines. Adults only join the fun when drunk (that's a fun page...) or to be "that crazy adult" who will "just not grow up!"'

"File that statement under lame shit that is said by people who don't have anything else to talk about! Zing!" I said that allowed to my dog. She looked up, licked her lips and went back to sleep.

'My point is, (yes, even in my thoughts, I have to say "My point is... or, Here's the thing..." otherwise, is there a point? Also, making a point about a point in your own personal voice it weird... wait, is it even possible?) 'What?!?' I chose a vinyl record from my collection, Spoon's, Kill the Moonlight. A band that my mother has said, "They sound like a band that I would like!" Also, they are a band that, if looked up in Wikipedia, has a huge disambiguation page. (Wait, are you wondering if I linked disambiguation to its term; or the word "spoon's" sense of disambiguation page? Me neither.)

'My point is that the "tramp" in trampoline may not have been our best collective (Star Trek rules!) choice as prefix for this product category. Tramp implies "homeless" and "vagrant" something that kids just shouldn't thought of just because they are jumping high in the air.' My computer had finished rebooting by this point and I was now "Googling" "entomology" so that I could rub my vast knowledge of two dollar (I love Yahoo answers) words in your face. Turns out, the word is "etymology" I hate when Google makes me wrong...

'Maybe the guy (believe it or not, NSFW) that invented the term "trampoline" had called it the jump-o-line during testing. Maybe he enjoyed watching his wife bounce on the device because he liked the movement that her boobs [NSFW] made as she bounced up and down. Maybe later, she was caught cheating on him, and the device reminded him forever of her infidelity and the fact that he kicked her to the curb. That's when he changed the prefix to "tramp." In that sense, it could be a warning to men everywhere to watch out for women that like his product. While it's unlikely that the product got its name in this way, I thought 'it's certainly plausible...'

By this point I had researched enough that that I knew the history of the word "trampoline" wasn't very interesting. My brain went onto the next topic.

'How weird is it that the more technologically advanced we get, the shorter the lifespan of our storage mediums? Stone etchings last a hell of a lot longer than hard drives and DVD's... I wonder why we haven't...'

This post has been brought to you by "Google" the silent killer...

Comments:

I've seen this post a lot, and the code for it is ATROCIOUS! I still like it though, not as much as Bob...